Happy New Year!!! :)

New years...

Isn't the best time to do some evaluation of the last year, and making new plans and having new goals..

Also, having someone new :)

I got 2 baby turtles.. :) It just happened! Didn't plan. I saw them in the subway!!! And I knew they will bring luck and love in this new year! :)

my lovely baby turtles need love, uv light, 28C temperature, a bigger space, stone, tree pieces...  any donation is accepted :)

So I have to make sure they will be alive.. If we think about my past: 1 bird, 1 rabbit, and they are all dead.. if there is anything in the world I'm regret, and will be, is these lives.. I think I killed them. Absolutely I did: I forgot to give water to my birdie for a week (probably I thought my mom would give some, cause she was visiting me that time), and my rabbit (the doc told that she was soo baby. she should had the mommy milk, not my fault.) Yes. I'm guilty. I accept that. But these turtles will live!!

merdie... she was being my best friend, and protector from dark and ghosts when I was living alone..

the first times, she was just walking, then she learned jumping!! And seeing her jump is the best thing..

whenever I see that photo, I remember how small she was and whenever I take her in my hands, she was sleeping like that..:((((((

My daddy told me: You're selfish, raising an animal at home is not their nature, it's not a toy, you can't have it like a devil-eye to give you luck.

He has a big point so I'm not gonna discuss it.. I agree with him.

Please wish me luck. They are so so so sweet. And although they are baby, they are super smart. I want to keep them forever! Also, I feel so sad for my bird and rabbit. Should I try to win the guilt feeling? Cause I feel guilty!

-----

EUROPE! TURKIYE!!

Happy new year!!! You're already in 2012?! How does it feel like? :)

Tonight there are so many parties, I picked the most nicest one :) Nice means? Not so crazy, like last year: Times Square.. This year, in a roof, watching the fireworks, with friends.. :)

I wish peace and more eco-friendly industrial applications for the world.

Love,
Turkish Girl

I Wanna Fly High!!

Woohoo! These guys went for kitesurfing but they couldn't stop when they saw this hot cliff. And look what they did :) I was always wondering if I can fly with kite, it seems yes! :) P.S Don't try without professionals :)

 
Murphys Cliff Project from Laola Pictures on Vimeo.

My Lovely Subway Crush

Here is one of my favorite song.. To make you ready for my story :) Click to the play button..

  

Once upon a time.. Turkish girl saw a magician. Woo! When she entered the subway she heard a beautiful music. And she was not the only one, everyone was moving where the music was coming from.. Just like Pied Piper!

Just like pied piper, the musician was attracting all people in the subway..

He was doing magic on people with his music. Everybody stopped and stared at him. Everybody stopped doing everything and only listened him. That was kind of weird, also reminded her the movie scene from The Perfume where everybody was under control of the guy who created the God's perfume.. Well.. That's the first and only time she saw him. And everything happened just there. He was playing violin and he was really good.. -the end- no no. Keep going.. :)

cute cute cute (Bruno Axel)

the way of changing someone's life even just for a while: do what you like to do. and do it best. 

Have you ever interested in some stranger and wanted to share this? There is a website where people post their subway crushes. http://subwaycrush.net That's a quite funny American website :)

Whatever, what I was saying or the storyteller.. Here is my subway crush. I think he is gorgeous! I hope he can make good money as he deserves.. He is so talented.

you don't have to be cute. first impression lasts till you say hi! you have to have some good guts and heart :)

The real end of this story, whatever you're doing, do it the best! This little cute boy was changing someone's life maybe just for a while, who knows, he was creating something beautiful (he was so kind and 2 children were watching him, and he made eye contact with them: one girl one boy, the girl one probably felt her first love, the boy one probably thought music is not bad, and maybe he'll be the next musician).

What do you create? What do you produce? Are you changing someones life (obviously in a positive way) even for a little while? Do your best whatever you're doing. That's the only thing you can learn from my cutest subway crush :)

Love,
Your Turkish Girl =)

P.S Thanks for the comments, we know my lovely subway crash name now: Bruno Axel. He's a passionate musician.I like him more than before now, cause I know his story a little bit more now :)

Black Friday Madness, Central Park, Macy's, and.. Turkish Girl!! :)

Well actually I wanted to write some details about the photos in the slideshow, however for this time I'll let you imagine this beautiful day!

I started my day at 86th street, spend 2 hours almost in the park, saw children playing with the leafs and musicians, and puppies, etc..

Then 5th Avenue, and holy craziness.. Although I only wanted to take some photos, I couldn't resist the clothes, chocolates and the at least 50% discounts! Wuuuh.. Yep, I think I spent 2 hours watching people and the hmm, yes, products and prices.. Didn't buy anything :) Mommy loves me!

Also today there is NYC Half Marathon, I wish I could join..

Lazy Americans

I walked a lot on Black Friday instead of shopping, my next post will be these photos :)

Europeans have a lot of holidays and long.. And I heard Americans don't. Also I heard Americans are lazy.. I still hear a lot.. But here some observations from my view:

Americans also have so many holidays (edit: they still have to work after holidays. It's not long as Canadians or Europeans)

1. 4th of July: They celebrate the independence of America. Serious. National. They go to beach or leave the city and celebrate with friends and family. Read my 4th of July story here :)


2. Labor day: Everywhere is surrounded with American flags, and it's kinda serious celebration, but it's in summer as 4th of July, so people go beaches and celebrate at the shore with friends and family..


3. Halloween: I still don't know why they celebrate the Halloween, and I'm not sure anyone really knows.. The point is being someone else in one day. Girls generally dress and act like a bad girl, boys.. superhero or monster or killer or etc.. (I remember I screamed few couple times, when I saw the guy with the SAW or knife next to me.. They had fun I'm sure) Everybody take it so serious! They plan their the night and dress weeks, months ago..


4. Thanksgiving: Cute. Family members or friends get together, host cooks turkey, and then they eat and thank and drink and play and at the end fall asleep on the couch or chair..


5. Christmas: It's coming!! The next day of Halloween, they started selling Christmas decoration, so how do you say? Commercial? Whatever it is, they make people feel the soul and BUY :) buy, buy, buy... I remember once, a friend told me he buys at least 20 gift per his grandchildren.. 20?? Seriously? If everybody buy 20, it will make like 80 gifts at least. Is that really necessary and make the kids feel better?? Whatever, it's not my problem, I don't receive gifts :( (edit: I received a Christmas gift~ :))

Christmas is coming.. I was always visiting Europe in Christmas, but living in a city where people celebrate it is different! I feel it's coming.. Last year a friend invited me to their home, so they had the cute tree and gifts and etc.. Was like a movie.. This year it will be more real..

November and New York.. probably the most romantic combination, ha? 

And.. The other issue: Americans are lazy.. The truth: New Yorkers are NOT lazy. They work really long hours.. 10-15 hours in a day. I'm not talking about the millionaire New Yorkers, but the others.. They are not lazy. Most of them go to gym, they workout so crazy and yes, they work hard.

However, Americans ≠ New Yorkers. That's why I've put making a road trip to know the culture in my to-do-list.

la la la.. I think I'm not an addict!!

"Computers are useless. They can only give you answers."

-Pablo Picasso

Yes, yes! I'm not using my phone anymore :)

Last weekend, my credit finished and then I didn't buy. Now, I still don't want to buy. And you know what?

• I'm very much more focused on what I'm doing now.
• The first thing I do in the morning is not checking my messages and emails.
• Wow! It's amazing. I finish the task I'm working on, not with purpose! I always start and focus, and finish.. that's our nature, right? But this smart phones.. distract me and my concentration.. So generally it took my x2 times to finish with distractions.
• Now, I just start, and finish. If I'm doing what I like to do, I don't even realize the time pass so fast.
• If I'm not working on something serious, I check my emails in every hour.
• I don't have to answer any text messages, because I don't receive them :)
• Calls? I normally don't answer them, if it's important they can leave a voicemail. I've never been a person who chat on phone. I talk very short: "so, what's the point?" 
• No need to talk about radiation.. :)

Yes, we are in a time of technology addiction. It's %100 normal. Especially new generation kids: they live with their ipads or smart phones. Yep, maybe they get smarter or something like that, however I think there are some dangers in this I-love-technology-addiction-world: time loss, emotion loss, unhappiness of getting no real relationships but cyber.. addiction of using social media, smart phones.. if you don't control how you use it, as all of other addictions it will control you. 

Accept that fact: it will be like that and will increase. We will use them whether they are good or not (it helps you! It save time and energy. It makes life easier). We should use them: to live and follow up, it's a need. I've just sent a facebook message to my bank with their app, could I do that by calling Turkiye so fast? No.

On the other hand. Be careful to be not lost in this huge area. Don't let technology control you. And your one of precious: your time. Time, time, time..

Let's see how long I'm going to live without phone. I don't think long.. I can't listen Pandora :( And, communication is a need, like real time communication. Well.. I think I just need some time to relax.. and also, I prove that I'm not addict :)

P.S It took only 8 days. It's absolutely not easy to find address especially for someone idiot like me about directions, also for a Mediterranean who's always late to appointments like me needs a phone! :(

I'm begging you, please love me! :)

Mondays.. One of my favorite day. Beginning of a new week. I like new starts.

I picked this song for this week. Also, if I have a little time, I'll play this song and take a video clip :) haha

I don't write this into my to-do list, but I had this idea to discover Brooklyn. Every cool person live there! And I have no idea about there!! I was enough courage to come New York from Turkey but not going out from Manhattan to anywhere else.. except Miami and Atlantic City..

Yep, I hope a very busy week waits for everyone with so many challenges! :)

Also, I think you can share your challenges in the comment box. I know from all around the world, people read my blog (not a lot, but world wide), why don't you write that not everything is easy and you're working hard to get it.. That would be nice to hear that :)

a little tummy?

Ok. That was too much..

Not just because I was feeling unenergetic and less strong..

First, when I said I'll start gym this week to my roommates, they were like "oh yeaa, when you came here you had a very good body shape, etc.."   O_o

Second, when I was talking with a friend on facebook chat, he said "did you stop doing sports? I saw you have a little tummy"   O_o

Really?

And, here I am, started my gym life again, in summer it sucks to be indoor, so.. now freezing winter is coming and I'm started making love with sport center again!

Again?

My last 6 years was with gym, 3 days ago, when I started again, I realized one of the biggest thing I missed from Istanbul is my gym life: working out, playing basketball, ping-pong, MY FRIENDS! I never paid cause they always knew me.. :) and I realized I'm missing it..

I miss my motorcycle, always..
I miss my gym life, and friends..

My last 2 days was so painful with the muscle pain, I couldn't laugh, couldn't move so well.. hehe. That's great to feel that way.. So, this whole winter, and next years, forever I'll do that.. again and again..

HERE is a great photo express my feelings about working out :))

OH WOW.

Here is a great great great story for you to read.. and for me to read again. We should never give up keep going. Improving. Failure? -Good, you tried, and now fix? No? -Then do it again. It's not for money, it's for ourselves. (My reader: can you feel that still there is something missing in my puzzle? And I'm coming to this topic again and again. Same dilemma. How can I find it? Reading success stories, people who works so hard, FOR WHAT? It can't be for money. It can't be for "Ok, I'll create something unique to help people, let's think what?" How these stories had written? How does it start? I think I want a group of people who has time to discuss entrepreneurship, success, failure, life, beauty, etc..) I'm not happy in these days..

I NEED A MENTOR!!!!! To direct my energy.. To create, to build, to do..! Just now in this period of my life..

Dark Times 2, How To Not Give Up :)

I got my answers to my questions.. I believe in a very unexpected time, you can find the thing you were looking for, maybe you don't even know you're looking for it, but that was the missing thing in your life and mind or heart.. And you get it by a person you don't expect to hear, meet, etc.. with a music, quote, book, movie that gives you the power, energy and inspiration that you needed.

Steve Jobs is dead. I didn't know him so well, let's say I didn't know who he was.

Randomly I found that video.

And I got my answers..

His stories gave me power.

I wanted to do what I like to do. Rest of my life. With passion.

I didn't want to be someone else or someone else's someone.

I don't have an easy life, I'm doing a lot to live it in a way that I want.. I appreciate that: people who have everything and an easy life give up things easily and they are not that successful (some are great, cause the parent education). I see kids who have everything, their parents supply, and on the other hand someone like Steve Jobs who got his own life, followed his dreams and worked for it till death!

Here the video: maybe you already watched it, do it again! I couldn't keep my tears, and I thanked him a lot.. I'm sure it will help you, too.. Also, he is a great public speaker!

Oh, Turkish Girl's question was: specially when we start start something, change something, but in general when we follow our dreams, and make decisions, we met with a hole, dark hole, it takes you in, you question yourself, your goals, your purpose, and simply we lose our hope, belief and energy..what are we going to do when our belief shake?

Dark Times, How To Not Give Up :)

Oh my God, I was always wanted to go there. It's in Tailand I learned today :) So it's going to be in my to-do list now!

Dark times.. every single person have these times.. because of a friend, boyfriend girlfriend, boss, family.. financial, emotional .. especially when we start something new, a feeling poke us: did I do good to do that? A marriage, maybe leaving your corporate job and starting your own business, or leaving a country.. in that dark times, we lose our hope, belief and energy.. and that's the time we realize actually that's all we got. Only with that we can built armys, or save billions of peoples life..

That's why the people who believe their product and promote, the couple who believe their love and eachother, the man who believe pure God are the WINNER! Not the one who works only for money. Steve Jobs, I think he was a great believer! He believed what he was doing from heart, and I'm sure he had a lot of dark times which made him questioning if he was on the right path. And I'm sure he had his own system to get over that feeling to be more successful.

Still the question is here: what are we going to do when our belief shake? What does a ship do when it lost it's way in the ocean? I don't know the answer, but I can brainstorm:

• We need a compass to show us our direction. That could be a well-prepared business plan, or our goals and dreams.
• In The Quran first rule is READ. Well, that's the greatest rule ever: read. But we don't have a lot of time right? So we need to be picky and read something according to achieve our goals. It will help us to keep going in our direction. Or sometimes, to change our direction, too..
• But also, write. You'll surprise a lot when you read what you wrote 1 years ago. And in these dark times, you can go back and read, and remember why you did that.  For example: you divorced from your partner, and you feel weird because you remember the good times.. you think maybe that was a mistake to divorce, and now you're lonely. You don't have friends who support you, etc.. If you had written what happened before, and how you were unhappy, you'd be glad to be divorced.
• Same example: If you write what happens at work, if you're living some bad days with your colleague or boss or partner, two months later when you decide to talk with someone, or quit your job, you'll remember what you had to live. Because we humans FORGET! We forget things. Good or bad. 
• Read.
• Write.
• Maybe you were really wrong, when you read you'll realize how stupid you were :) haha. hope not. But if that happens that's good to realize and change. 
• Look at the moon. Look at the buildings, sea, ocean, sun..Look at the people. They are all living in their life, everyone think they are the only one in the world. Just for few minutes think and feel you're a little tiny part of the big picture, universe. That will give you a power if you have a direction on your life. Otherwise, you'll feel weak.. and desperate..
• Follow your instincts. (I'm not comfortable to say that. Because some instincts are killing, abusing, etc.. I believe everybody have an angel and devil inside themself. We make a decision in our behaviors to choose the good or bad. But please don't insult devil. Or don't praise angels. It's us. We chose to do that. Consciously. So, when I say follow your instincts I mean the good side. What makes you happy, and satisfied, you know better than others. Follow your instincts.)
• Message your old friends, ask how they are and if you can help them with something. Maybe they are in their dark times, that will make their day.
• Don't be tired to meet new people. You never know who they will become in your life. Just look at the opportunities. Listen, and share.

Wish you luck! And don't forget we create our luck. Just look for it! =)

Edit: hehe click here to read my brand new great awesome answer

Turkish Girl, Animals, St. Francis Day & Manhattan

Well, I was late, had to enter as a press.. Don't ask how..

My favorite animals there. Aren't they beautiful?! I love love them..

My second best! Baby kangaroo. The softest thing ever.. and baby...

The guy told that nobody wanted to carry the rat, but he thought it's NYC's animal cause everywhere are rats!

That's a fox+something. Cute. :)

Papa? Priest? I don't know.. but probably he and his team organized the event.  Good job!

What else can I do between the press? :)

Camel in the cathedral. 

Great dancers! Christopher Caines Dance Company!

My first reaction I screamed. Then I said: I have to touch it. Because I'm scared from this gorgeous animal. And I did. :)

This kid was psychic. psychopath. he disturbed the snake a lot!

Baby puppy..

I love goats!

Gross?! I don't know why I don't like pigs? It was the first time I heard the pig sound. But I just left.  Annoying.  Not interesting. At all!

Haha! I don't know what it is! :) cool! I love him, too! :) maybe her..

She bite the ring :) and didn't let it go for a while.. 

cute little girl

St Francis Day in Manhattan! :)

beautiful mommy and baby..

A talking papagan! =)

When You Wake Up...

If you have a headache, pain in muscles, sick in stomach, you can't drink or eat anything otherwise you give them back to the earth.. You don't remember so much about last night, but you check your text messages that you've sent some people, and they are not nice... That's what called hangover: it sucks! It takes 5-24 hours to get better physically. So, I'll give a list how to avoid this terrible, awful sickness feeling which ruin your great night, and morning, and day:

1. Before drinking, don't be hungry. With an empty stomach it's not a good idea. Although you drink only 2 glass of wine, you'll feel bad, bad, bad..
2. If you're planning to drink a lot, eat something with olive oil (or drink it :p), it'll protect your stomach wall.
3. Do not mix different kind of drinks: tequila, wine, vodka, beer.. Start with one kind, and finish with one.
4. In the morning, caffeine will help you to feel better (cure you): coffee, yea, but Red Bull is the best.
5. It doesn't matter if you're a female or male, get wasted with someone you trust.
6. Any limit? Well, there is not such a thing like more alcohol more fun. Science tells us, if we drink more, we are not us anymore, and it's not fun anymore either. It's a sickness. Keep it balanced..
7. Do not lose the control. Enjoy your time.

Any more suggestions? And do you have interesting stories about hangover? :) Write in the comment box!

Dreams, but the bad one..

A man was hitting a woman. I was hearing the sound of the woman begging to not hit to her ears, and I was running to stop him.. I was running so fast, but not enough fast, I was not seeing anything because they were in a room. And he was fast. The woman was crying.. When I had a view at last, I saw his face, angry, and punching like a boxer, very professional and fast; he lost himself.. And I knew I was late.. :((

That's the nightmare I saw today. I woke up with this desperate feeling and anger, my heart was beating so fast. I knew it was just a bad dream but I also knew that was happening somewhere in the world that moment, every second..

A lot of women are abused from their husbands, fathers, brothers.. And if their neighbors, family members hear anything about that, THAT'S OKAY. That's the normal thing. Women also accept that this is their destiny, or something like that.

I want to curse that looser people who use their physical power to hit the less stronger one. You are so weak. Mothers who hit their kids, men who hits the women, soldiers who hit the civil, human who hit the animals. I don't have enough words to tell. This video is nice. I didn't know every year 1400 women die, I think it's just in USA.

One Of My Man Made A Good Decision..

Good news!

My lovely brother stopped smoking. I asked my favorite question: why? He said one day he went out to smoke, and then asked himself why he is smoking, and got no answer and at that moment he decided to not smoke again.

Turkish girl wants to go somewhere like that. In winter I'll go :)

10 years ago, when he tried first I was there, too. He said "you were like "nooo, don't try, then you'll get used to smoke." I remember he said "No, I'm not going to. Don't worry". If he says don't worry, I really don't worry. So I never talked about it again, but he smoked for 10 years.

He said he paid more than $10,000.

He said now he can taste whatever he eats. Before everything he ate were same.

He said he can breath now.

Congratulations bro!!!! Don't give up! Because I always say habits are our biggest enemy. Change it. Then you'll get used the new one.

Love you. :)

P.S Wooo!! I was just looking for some keywords, do you know people google mostly "how to stop" and then the next popular one is "how to smoke"!!! TV, celebrities, censorship, high prices, etc tell children it's cool. But they don't know how to smoke. I've tried once in Amsterdam :p, I couldn't do it. It's not that easy, it hurts at the first, you cough. 

P.S.2 That's my last entry about smoke and cigarettes. Everyone has their own decisions, I'm not judging them. These are my opinions, and here is my world. I have that right to share it here. But nobody has a right to poison children (actually they have), and nobody has a right to encourage them to smoke (still, they have. children=next generation=consumers=marketing=sales)

Calendar Issue

I have so many calendars: online, mobile and note-books. And still sometimes I forget my things to do, because they are not in one place.. So I decided to get a real one piece calendar.

Something like big for office desks, but hold on. What if I'm not in the office, or wherever this huge calendar? No, no no. I want something in one place, but don't want to give any efforts to write everything one place later. Otherwise I could use online programs for that.

I want it on paper. I wanna scratch, and take some little notes on it. 

Maybe I need to get something like great businessman, entrepreneur, philanthropist Sakıp Sabancı was using. Small very small classy and simple calendars.. He was writing every important events, appointment, etc there..with his beautiful, careful handwriting.

Oops. That's another issue. My handwriting is huge and not very tidy.. Although I feel responsible to environment I use whole papers to write, think, and organize.

So:

• I can't use online calendars, I want it on a paper.
• A big calendar? I can't carry, and then I have to write collect other details into this one? No, I want to write only once.
• A small nice calendar? Well, my handwriting is big. Small papers are too small for my activities and handwriting.

I know it's not a Gordian Knot but I need a solution very soon. Please don't hesitate to write your ideas in the comment box if you have one :)

Sunday Turkish Breakfast

Today, I had a really great breakfast. I'm so happy! :)

Everything started when I decided to walk in this beautiful Sunday afternoon. I found a new grocery shop: they have tons of breads, fruits, vegetables, etc.. Olives!!! I think Americans don't eat olive, I mean there is something like calamari olives (zeytin tursusu?!), it's not same what we're eating in Turkey. They have some feta cheese you can't find everywhere, it's not same with our cheese.. And bread? Some kind of bread, not like European bread. But I'm a bread person, I love bread, pasta, etc..

But today, I bought kind of original olives, cheese, and a green vegetable. I don't know it's name. I never saw that in New York before. When I saw that vegetable in the grocery I'm literally said "Oh my God! I love you!"

I had a great Turkish breakfast, it's a beautiful day.. =)

My Turkish breakfast: goat cheese, tomatoes, olives, cucumber, yummy bread, and green vegetable

9 11

I was 14-15 when 9/11 happened. I was in Turkey, and everyone was watching TV, trying to understand what's happening in New York. Trade Centers, I was thinking about if they are really the center of trade.. I remember everyone was sad. But a week later, probably we just remembered it as any bad thing in another country.

But now I'm in New York, and actually 9/11 was not just anything I watched in TV. Like a TV show or movie.. It really happened. In a very unexpected moment. How can you expect a plane, no, 2 plane will crash your buildings?!

I met with a guy, he was working in that building, when the security and 911 was telling "Stay wherever you are" his manager said "No, we're going out, now! Everyone!" and that's his story, he was lucky that he had a manager who was not following rules.

I went walking to Battery Park, and I saw these thousands of white flags, and other day, I went meeting with my friends at Bryant Park, there were empty chairs, I thought there will be a concert thing, but no. After I watched the details of what happened that day and how on TV, I understood, it was the ceremony for the memorial day of 9/11. And now I can feel the lost.

I don't have enough words to curse terror. I can't even describe it. But it's same in every country: civil - innocent people are the victims. Lost are the same lost, anger is the same anger.

Rest in peace.

Thinking about thinking..

Sometimes my friends tell me I'm thinking too much. Well, not the quantity, but the quality is the important thing.. Not how much but how you're thinking is the point. We, lovely humans (specially me) have some distorted thinking styles that hurt us. It's not good! No good. Here is the list:

All of us sometimes have these thinking styles, maybe this list can help us to be more open-minded and realize  our mistakes. Let's get better :)

      1. Filtering: You basically pick up only negative things between all other positive things.

• Your girlfriend, boyfriend do a lot of awesome things and you just focus the negative things, and make your relationship terrible.
• Your startup company is doing very well, but you expected a faster expanding, then you focus on that, and make your life a nightmare, also your employes.

Chill.. You're doing great. Why do you focus only negative things? Of course be aware but focus on positive things. Life is great, you're doing great, your partner actually loves you, your employees actually working pretty well. Let's motivate everyone.

     2. Polarized thinking: Everything is white or black, good or bad.

• You have to be perfect or you're a failure. 
• Your job, your parents have to be best or it's not for you. 

Chill.. There can be other options. You don't have to be perfect. And actually what makes us perfect is our mistakes and differences than the standard perfect. 

  
     3. Overgeneralization: You come to a general conclusion with a single experience.

• Once you've hurt yourself when you were cutting potatoes doesn't mean that will happen always.
• Once you've failed in one single project that doesn't mean you're never going to be successful.

Chill.. Try to avoid using "always", "never" conclusions. You just experienced it. Be open-minded and free without judgements.

     4. Mind-reading: Ahaa! This is very common. Without listening or watching what the others think, we comes a conclusion. Make the decision what they think.

• Simple but too much simple we ignore: Everybody's mind and understanding work differently. 2 people look at same thing but they see something different. 
• They don't feel the same with you. Everybody's love language are different from each other.

Chill.. Listen and watch if you really want to understand what they think and feel. If you don't know how to read body language and word language wait for my next posts :)

     5. Catastrophizing: Even writing about it, makes me feel bad. WHAT IF? Terrible two words you're using in your daily life.. 

• What if something bad happens?
• What if she leaves me?
• What if earthquake happens?
• etc. etc.

Chill...!!!! Shut your brain up. Stop thinking like that. Don't you see there is no ending of this imagination and it doesn't help in the end, there is no point. Stop. If not, don't talk to me please! And don't talk to your parents, friends, colleagues, etc.. :)

     6. Personalization: Yea, everything happens around you is actually happens for you! No, no, that's just sarcasm. But with this distorted thinking you take everything personal.

• It's raining in your birthday. God doesn't like you :(
• She said she likes only smart people, oops, she meant you're not smart?!

Chill.. If it's not directly told to you, then you can only assume, but still that doesn't mean anything. Be positive listen, try to help, it's not a game like there has to be a meaning of everything. Maybe that's what they say only. She likes smart people. Don't take it personal.

     7. Control Fallacies: You think life controls you. There is nothing you can do about it. Your mom has a problem, and you can't do anything about that and feeling guilty about that. I'm not sure about that. Check source. :)

     8. Fallacy of Fairness: Ha. You think you knows everything. You know what's fair. And others are miserable with their point of views and minds.

• Religious people think other religion's people are miserable, that they can't see the only truth.
• You're absolutely right, you smile others, and think don't even listen them, because you know best. 

Chill.. Realize that you're making yourself stuck in your mind, and playing God, decide for the fair. Again, please check the source to be sure.

     9. Blaming: It's a easy way of anything unwanted happens. You blame the others, or yourself. Take no responsibility, just feel pain, cursing yourself, or others.

     10. Shoulds: :) You have lists of what things supposed to be like. If not happen that you're not okay, or the others are not okay. Then you feel guilty or reject someone because they didn't do what they had to do. No-good thinking style.

     11. Emotional Reasoning: Lol. Today you feel a little bit sad, then you should be sad. Let's find some reasons to be sad. You feel angry!! Let's find some victims to shout at! Let's make your emotions control you. Women! Your job is difficult because scientists say that our body works under control of so many different things: moon, stars, your eggs cycle, etc :) Don't always trust your feelings..

      12. Fallacy of Change: They have to change for you. If this guy smokes, he should stop smoking for our happiness, and if you insist enough you can change him. You can change everything if you work on this. Well. Let's chill.. :) Accept people as they are. If you don't like them as they are then just leave!

      13.  Global Labeling: Generalization, prejudice, snap-judjements. Just because you met few couple people in New York, you start telling New Yorkers are ... Just because your ex-girlfriend was cleaning and cooking to you, that doesn't mean girlfriends do that! Just because your husband cheated you, that doesn't mean guys cheat always.

      14. Being Right: You have to be right. You can't be wrong. That's your only purpose when you talk, to prove you're right. You start your sentences "nooo", "you're wrong". You never really listen what other trying to say, or why they believe so.

     15. Heaven's Reward Fallacy: You did everything "right". Where is your reward?! No reward? Oh, you became sad, and broken, that's not fair, you did everything right.. Let's just do things makes you feel satisfied and happy. For example, ladies, I hear a lot of you say "I did everything for him, cleaned, cooked, raised his children, didn't follow my career, and look what's my reward??!!" You did everything because you wanted so. At least let's do what you really want to do, not to get a reward afterwards. Right now, do you want to do this? Do you want to leave your work, and be your house's and man's woman? If yes, you do it because you wanted it so, and that's your reward!

Me? Yes, I do these common mistakes a lot! Mind-reading, I love it. =) But, I know, they are not good. I'm trying to work on them to change it. I tell people I do generally mind reading so let me ask you to be clear. In New York City, it's so easy to be straight forward. That's one of the best part to live here :)

Source: access.ewu.edu

Yoga - Brain Shaking - Thinking - Einstein - Love

Today in my tao yoga class, we tried something new: brain shaking. Here how to do it:

• Slowly shake your head. Sorry. In a very small distance, shake your head fastly.
• It should be really in a minimum area.
• You should do it fast.
• Take deep breath.
• Exhale slowly to get rid of your bad energy and problems in your brain.

Result:

• I have headache.
• I don't really wanna hear "exhale" "donjon" "belly button" anymore.
• I'll do only normal classic yoga in my next years.
• Maybe no yoga anymore.
• Just other workouts.
• Can someone tell me why should I stop thinking?? You know part of meditation you shouldn't think anything. I can do that whenever I want. But. I WANT TO THINK :) Want to think my daily little life, how much I started to love & admire Einstein, how facebook became so popular & why it's started annoying its users, what I'm gonna eat, should I cook or buy some food, ohh I have to call my parents, also need to call this place for appointment, etc.. Why not? Does it make you tired, too? I  prefer a busy brain rather than an empty one. (I know there is something wrong in this statement, but right now I just want to believe what I wrote) 

Hmm.. by the way, sometimes my friends tell me I'm thinking too much. I think, thinking a lot is not that bad, but how you're thinking is extremely important. I made a list of human distorted thinking styles. Next days I'll post it :)

Since then,

I'll enjoy rest of the labor day (USA) - holiday - #awesomeness

I'll celebrate Turkish Basketball Team's Success

I've really started to falling in love with Einstein. It's like my childhood love - Ataturk. Learning more about him is in my to-do-list

Experiences, Fears, I think..

I'm going to a public speaking class in New York City. Last week before fake hurricane came, I gave my first speech, the topic was me - myself, cause they think that's the topic everybody know most and will be more relax! 

First of all, I'm a very comfortable person who can speak easily and express feelings and ideas (I think so). However, years ago I was a terrible speaker, my first-first speech in front of 50 students was a disaster. My mouth was being dry, my voice was shaking, my stomach was feeling sick, awww, that was so embarrassing, my face was burning, and I'm sure it was red even it is impossible. Now, I still feel nervous, excited, and feel breathless. That's what I like maybe, it's adrenaline! :) I love this hormone. It gives me energy. I can speak fluently, and effectively. Do you think it happened just with a medicine or therapy or miracle? No. Practicing.. working on my fear.. to win my fear and to be more stronger. I think that's what I did. And I'm still doing it. :) 

Last week, I've talked about my life, 3 miracles in my life:

1. My birth :)

2. My second life 

3. Realizing my second life was a miracle, and have to do something more & better than working in a 9-5 job, and leaving my lovely city to find the purpose of my life, and to find the opportunity to make the world a better place was my third miracle. Shortly, taking control of my life was my third miracle.

After telling these, I saw everyone was listening carefully -cause that's a bit too honest, intimate- I fucked it up (what else can I say rather than fucked up, screwed up in a nice way??). I didn't make any preparation after this first part, and I had a very bad ending, forgot so many things that I thought to talk about. And my body language & sound got all weird.

Okay here is my short list how to make your public speaking terrible & awful :)

• Don't be prepared for the speech.
• Just focus on your excitement, nervousness, and get more of them.
• Don't take deep breaths and don't exhale slowly.
• Trust yourself too much, be overconfident, or have no confident.
• Don't have note cards during your speech, just spontaneously talk.
• Don't make eye contact w/ audience.
• Just read your papers, put your head down.
• Dress something you don't feel comfortable.
• Don't know who your audience is/are.
• Keep your voice very boring to make people sleep.
• Make it a forever speech, too long.
• If something happen that distracts your audience, pretend it never happened.

I realized I can keep this list forever. There is so many things to make your speech awful. I wish you luck at your speeches, but as you can see it's not about luck :)

Lovely Irene, Welcome to New York!

Omg! 

Hurricane Irene is coming to New York. I've never been somewhere before where people get ready so well: I think if the end of the world comes, they will still be alive.

• They shopped everything for forever. Water, eggs, meat, chocolate, etc.. There was nothing left in malls.
• All of the movies are rented.
• They say the water can reach till second floors, so there will be boat emergency team.
• MTA, all subways, bus services are shut down! The first time ever in the history!
• In Atlantic City all casinos are closed, that means a lot!
• There were surfers in the ocean because they love waves, but now it's noon, 27th I don't think they are still there.
• Everything seems so unreal, but also real cause of the Hollywood movies!! 
• They shut down all of this Manhattan Island, like we're in quarantine, like we will be zombies!!

Weheee!! It's coming!! :)

Friends, and others, good luck, be safe and have fun! That can be a story you can tell your grandsons.

RESPECT?!

An example of Ron English's propaganda art

I have an issue with myself: I do not know how to respect people who smokes and feeds their children w/fast food. 

Cigarette:

• Officially dangerous for health.
• On the cigarette boxes, there are disgusting facts & pictures.
• Smells gross! Ugh!
• After smoking, smells worse! Talking w/these people even you like them, yucks! Can't imagine kissing..
• Are they brain-disabled? NO! They are cool people generally! (Oops, I just remembered one of best friend smokes, s**t! And my lovely brother, and father, and.. lol)
• It's their choice. 
• And, they are publicly hacked: no smoke inside, sometimes, in special ugly rooms..
• But, question: how can I just feel normal for them?? I feel I do discriminate them :) haha. That's no good!

Fast Food:

• I just watched Supersize Me. Great documentary.
• In Turkey I was eating Mc Donald's, Burger King, etc 4-5 times in a year. It was always delicious, but I didn't want to get used to eat them.
• In New York, well, because they are really fast, in 1-2 minutes you get your food and I'm in a rush all time, I eat once in a month I think :(
• After eating, I feel like I'm dead: wanna sleep forever.

So, how can I respect:

• A mom who tells her 3-4 years old children "if you do that, I'll buy you french fries, Mcdonald's". Is this *** becoming a reward?
• I remember when I was in Tallin, at zoo, I was just looking at kids, taking photos of them, they were the cutest!! And when we were eating something, I couldn't stop staring at their parents who feed them with fast food. I remember my friend was "stop it" to me. How can I act in a normal way?? Do I react too much?
• Beautiful, smart, adult people who smoke?
• For kids, okay I can see the main reason why they smoke: it's cool! I think I respect them, they are too young, and maybe their parents didn't teach them how it will damage their health and relationship, and don't have to do these things to be cool.

Let's stop thinking we'll not be like Fat America! It's closer then you're thinking. Europeans - Asians! Don't destroy your healthy delicious eating habits. We pay a lot here to eat your cuisine. Every 12 years old children deserve to be healthy. Don't make them eat these lovely fat food, if you can. Fast food is cheap! Cooking takes a lot of time & money! It's your decision..

Well, I think I was improved, years ago, I had no tolerance, I was the most boring annoying person who tells people what they already know, and try to make them stop =) Now, maybe I'm still boring-annoying, but I don't talk about smoking, do I?

P.S From now on, I'll not eat anything from McDonald's, Burger King, Wendy's, etc.. Trust me it's not easy, specially after watching Supersize Me, they were looking so delicious, and I'm hungry now. But I love myself so much, and my future babies, that I don't want to effect them. Okay, let's say 2 times in a year! :) This year I've already ate too much. In 2012, I'll eat 2 times! Yay!

Being in Heaven

I think I was in heaven yesterday, my heaven: one of the greatest mentor I've ever had invited me to a networking event with entrepreneurs and investors. 

One of the sponsor company ER Accelerator, is a non-profit organization helps entrepreneurs succeed. I do love what they do! 

Yesterday was hilarious. Great. Lovely. 

I was like a monster: excited, hungry to get some inspiration & listen new startup's stories.

Imagine a party that everyone has a new idea, to help people according to their needs, they create a service or product. Well, in general everybody have some ideas, they always talk, but yesterday, I met these people who activate their plans and ideas, they started-up their own companies, they took actions!

Yummy. Delicious! :)

Was a great pleasure to connect with these entrepreneurs, investors. Hopefully I'll have time to follow up with them. I think that's another part I like about New York as Istanbul: there are tons & tons of creative, smart, interesting people to keep in touch.

Yay!